Period.

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Last time I visited my parents we stumbled upon an episode of The Middle playing on the Hallmark Channel.  It’s Thanksgiving and the extended family is gathered at the grandparents’ house.  Throughout the day the women of the family gather at the kitchen table to talk.  It’s a no kid zone and they revel in their time together apart from the rest of the family.

Sue Heck, the beautifully awkward, contagiously enthusiastic, overwhelmingly geeky teenager walks in to the kitchen where the women are and ceremoniously announces with a toothy braces-filled smile that this Thanksgiving she will finally be sitting with the women because she got her period.

I’ve seen the episode before and I could read her lips.  That’s how I know that she says the word “period.”  Otherwise I wouldn’t – because the Hallmark Channel bleeped the word “period.”

I was aghast.  Not only is this piece of information central to that main storyline in the episode, but this show normally airs on broadcast TV at 8pm.  If it doesn’t need bleeping then, why did Hallmark apply a stricter standard?

We hardly ever watch Hallmark because we don’t get the channel at our house but I can see from their tagline when I Google it that they are about “Family, Holidays, Original Movies & Series.”  Just as I suspected:  “family.”  How, exactly, do you celebrate family values without acknowledging the way families are created?  How do you prioritize and focus on family while treating the fact of women’s menstruation as a dirty little secret?

The bleeping in this episode is particularly ironic, given that the other main story line is the teenage son, Axel – along with his dad and his granddad – trying to pick up a teenage convenience store clerk with their pick-up lines.  To recap:  Girls experiencing menstruation as a rite of passage, taboo; boys and grown men hounding a teenage girl at work, full of family values!

The Middle is a great comedy that often has something worthwhile to add to conversations about class in our country.  So I’m not picking on the show, which was, after all, setting up the antics of the grown men trying to “help” Axel with pick-up lines as the unsettling, ridiculous attempts they were.  I am pointing out the tone-deafness of the Hallmark Channel.

There is nothing “un-family” or inappropriate about a young girl announcing, “I got my period.” The language is as neutral as possible without using the technical, medical-sounding “menstruation.”  Is the concern about having to explain the facts of life to young children before parents are ready for that conversation?  If so, the bleeping seems misguided.  “Period” is not even a word that would make a young child’s ears perk up upon hearing it.  “Period” is used all the time, in a variety of contexts.  Bleeping it calls more attention to it.

This started as a minor post about a network’s stupid decision to bleep a natural, everyday part of life in the supposed interest of “family.”  But in a week where a young woman is still missing from the university community where I minister, in a week where beloved Hermione Granger actress Emma Watson is viciously threatened for expressing her feminist beliefs at the UN, and in a week where  NPR is reporting on Gamergate, it’s obviously not just about Sue Heck’s period.

We are clearly still having trouble acknowledging the humanity and dignity of every person, regardless of gender, sexuality, religion, opinions, and a host of other things.  I could let Hallmark off the hook – it’s not the biggest fish to fry.  But it all adds up.  Bleeping “period” is the small, seemingly insignificant seed that grows into some mighty ugly, poisonous plants.

No one needs a bleep to protect them from a period.  Let it be right there in the midst of the family’s kitchen conversation where it belongs.

But Wait, There’s More: Butternut Squash Soup, Standby Recipe for Fall

fall leaves, fall color

I know I said we were finished with our Standby Recipes series, but when a couple of cool late August-early September days came along, I started to crave this soup.  Once you’ve had it you’ll know what I mean.  Simple and deeply satisfying (and vegan and gluten-free if you want it to be).

My friend Alison first made it for me when I landed in England, barely awake and hungry after a long night of travel.  It revived me and felt so much more nourishing than any of the easy-grab things I would have eaten, left to my own devices.  When I’m feeling lazy or tired and debating whether or not I want to get involved with a butternut squash, I remember how bone-deep-wonderful this tasted on that early English morning and how it only took her half an hour. 

Butternut Squash Soup

1 small-medium onion, diced

1 T butter or vegetable/olive oil

2-3 sprigs of fresh rosemary, chopped

1 small-medium butternut squash, peeled, seeds discarded, chopped into 1” pieces

1 quart vegetable stock

1 can white beans (like cannellini), rinsed and drained

Salt and pepper, to taste

Melt butter (or warm oil) in large pot or Dutch oven.  Add onion and sauté for several minutes until soft and translucent.  Add rosemary and continue sautéing for another minute or two.

Be careful peeling and chopping the squash.  (I use a good vegetable peeler (not a knife) to peel and then work on small sections at a time – it will be slippery.)  When you’ve tackled it, add it to the pot and pour in the vegetable stock.  Turn it up to a boil and cook, stirring occasionally, until squash is tender and easily pierced with a fork.

When the squash is getting close to done, add the beans and some fresh black pepper. 

Before I had a blender, I used a food processor for this next part and it’s perfectly yummy and acceptable to do so.  But if you have a blender, I recommend using it.  The soft, velvety purée you can achieve with the blender is perfection.  So, get whichever device you are going to use and, in small batches, purée the soup.  It is very easy to have it explode out of the blender when it’s hot and you put too much in, so be conservative.  I keep a bowl handy and pour out the blended soup into it, while continuing to blend the soup from the pot in batches.

When you have it all blended (a few stray beans left in the bottom of the pot is fine and adds a nice random texture to the final product, so don’t stress about those), pour the soup back into the pot.  Turn it down to warm and taste.  Adjust with salt and more pepper, if desired.

That’s it.  Homemade soup in half an hour.  Bliss.  Yum.  Go, make and enjoy!

Standby Recipes, The Final Edition: You want me to make pesto?

I started this Standby Recipes series to encourage folks who are swamped or inexperienced to prepare some real food, at least every once in a while.  I wanted you to just start somewhere and to feel confident messing around in the kitchen.  Well, I think you may be ready to fly, little birdies!  Moosewood Restaurant Ithaca New York

Before I end the series with this post, I’ll mention again that Smitten Kitchen is an excellent site for browsing and finding your own go-to standby recipes.  Another favorite for weeknight meals is a book called Simple Suppers: Fresh Ideas for the Weeknight Table by The Moosewood Collective.  If you read through the “Well-Stocked Pantry” appendix and take some of the tips to heart, you will always have enough of the right ingredients on hand to pull together a quick, tasty, healthy meal.

Here is one of the many recipes I use from Simple Suppers, for Fettuccine with Walnut Pesto.  I know, I know.  Pesto is something you buy in a plastic container at the store or order at restaurants.  It seems hard or too fancy or way too time-consuming.  Not so!  This is the recipe to prove you wrong and to demonstrate that you don’t have to wait for summer basil, either.

Fettuccine with Walnut Pesto

Cook 1 lb of fettuccine or other pasta according to the instructions on the box.  When it’s done, drain it but reserve about 1 cup of the pasta-cooking water.

While that is cooking, toast 1 c walnuts, keeping a close eye on them so they do not burn.  Set aside to cool.

Put all of these items into a food processor or blender and puree until smooth: 

  • 1 c chopped fresh or canned tomatoes (If it is any time but the height of summer tomato season, use diced, canned tomatoes.)
  • 2 garlic cloves
  • 1 T extra-virgin olive oil
  • ½ t salt

Add walnuts to the blender/food processor and process until the mixture is well-mixed and the consistency is a lumpy paste.  (If you are using fresh tomatoes you may need to add 1-2 T water.)

Put the drained pasta into a large serving bowl and toss it with the walnut pesto, adding the reserved cooking water as necessary to make it saucy enough.  Top it with fresh chopped basil and grated parmesan cheese, if desired.

The whole thing might take you 20-30 minutes the first time, but I bet you can whittle that down to 10-15 with practice.  Bon appétit!

*

photo credit:  © 2007 Michael Sauers, CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Standby Recipes #4: Stepping It Up a Notch

empty brownie pan

What’s wrong with this picture?

It’s Friday and you need some brownies this weekend.  I can tell.  Sure, you could pick some up at the coffee shop or the bakery section in the grocery store on the way home.  But I’m pretty sure what you really need are these brownies, hands down the best homemade brownies I’ve had.

So far in the standby recipes series I’ve gone easy on you and I’ve focused on dinner.  But everyone needs a little sweetness in life and what’s a snow day without a warm concoction to delight and indulge in?  I hope you don’t wait until it’s snowing again to try these because they are worth heating up the oven in summer.

Smitten Kitchen is a beautiful and tasty site for finding new gems and fresh takes on old favorites.  You don’t have to be an accomplished cook to follow along and you can spend a surprising amount of time hitting the “Surprise Me!” random recipe generator link. 

Here is the link to her “My Favorite Brownies” recipe, which is now my favorite brownie recipe, too.  A few tips from me:

  • I make them exactly as she describes, though I had to go out to find “flaky sea salt” (Maldon salt – you should rub it together between your palms after measuring, to break it up a bit before adding it to the other ingredients).  It’s a fancy ingredient and you can certainly use kosher sea salt (I did this the first time or two I made them), but the Maldon salt is a nice touch – and then you have it around for sprinkling on other dishes.
  • Before using this recipe, I had never tried her method of spraying and parchment in the bottom of the pan.  Try it!  It is wonderfully efficient.
  • Please don’t fret if you have never tried melting chocolate and butter together in this double boiler method she describes.  It is easier than you might think.  You put about 1-2 inches of water in the bottom of a saucepan and put a bowl on top of that pan (a glass Pyrex bowl is perfect for this).  It just needs to rest on the pan without touching the water below.  You put the butter and chocolate in the bowl as she directs and stir while the water below simmers (once you’ve got it boiling, turn it down to a simmer or very low boil so it doesn’t get too hot and burn the chocolate).  It is really that simple and now you can impress people by throwing around terms like “double boiler.”
  • One more note on ingredients:  Other than the splurge for the fancy salt, the ingredients are common kitchen staples and there are only 6 of them.  This is so easy to whip up!  I use regular Baker’s unsweetened chocolate and I have even made these with gluten-free flour on occasion and they were still amazing.

Happy Friday snow day in summer!

Standby Recipes #3: A Study in Simplicity

frozen peas package

As I wrote recently, I’m posting a few of my standby recipes, and here’s the third one.  Since my aim is to share a few tried and true, go-to, standby meals, this is one of those simple but satisfying gems.  Because I want you to actually want to prepare a meal for yourself from genuine raw ingredients –at least every once in a while – this is about as low-prep and raw as it gets.

I present to you the humble baked potato.  Seriously.  Real food, the oven does most of the work, and you feel truly fed.  Comfort food at its simplest and best.

If you have no other choice, you can microwave your potato but you will thank me after you’ve tried it in the oven.  If you happen to have a gas oven, stand back and be prepared to swoon.

Here’s what you do (and just multiply this for however many people you are feeding, other than yourself):

Turn your oven to 400F.  Use any type of “white” potato you like (russet, Idaho, Yukon Gold).  Scrub it clean in water and trim off any eyes or bad spots with a paring knife.  Leave the rest of the skin intact.  Poke a few holes in it with your knife or a fork.  When the oven is up to temperature, put the potato directly on the oven rack in the center of the oven and set a timer for 1 hour.

Go off and enjoy a glass of something, read a chapter in your novel, or watch an episode of Frasier on Netflix.

When the timer buzzes, check the potato by sticking a fork or knife in it.  The skin should be somewhat crackly and the knife should go in easy and smooth.  If you meet resistance, let it cook another 15 minutes or so and check again. 

Even if you think you don’t like peas, get some frozen green peas and be prepared to change your mind (by all means, use fresh ones if it’s summer or you can find them).  While the potato is finishing its last few minutes of cooking time, put a generous ½ – 1 cup of peas in a small saucepan with about an inch of water.  Turn it to hi and let the peas cook in the boiling water for 1-2 minutes.  They barely need cooking and should still have some texture (not mushy) when they’re done.  Drain the water off.

When the potato is ready, use pot holders to take it out of the oven and plop it on your plate.  Immediately slice it open and insert copious amounts of butter, mashing it into the flesh so it all becomes one lovely substance.

Top your butter-infused potato with peas, salt, and pepper.  If you are in the mood, add grated cheese.  Allow yourself to moan as you enjoy it.

Standby Recipes #2: Beans – No soaking required

dial on a crock pot

As I wrote last week, I’m posting a few of my standby recipes, and here’s the second one.  You are going to need a crock pot for this one but it will be a purchase that’s worth it.  This is satisfying and filling year-round and doesn’t heat up the kitchen the way an oven does.  You can let it cook overnight or during the day while you’re at work and you’re ready to go at dinner time.

Put the following ingredients in a crock pot and turn it on hi (if you want to eat in 3-6 hours) or lo (if you want to eat in 6-12).  Give it a stir every once in a while and add more liquid if it seems too dry.

  • 16 oz package of dried kidney or black beans, rinsed under cold water.  Examine the beans and remove any small rocks that may be hiding out in the mix.  (You really don’t have to soak the beans before cooking in a crock pot.  Yes!)
  • 1 can diced tomatoes, fire-roasted if you can find it
  • Generous pinch or two of salt and some fresh black pepper
  • 1-2 tsps of chopped jalapeno peppers.  I use prepared ones from a jar, so we always have a few in the fridge.  Test for heat if you are using fresh and adjust the amount as needed.
  • Water or vegetable stock to cover the other ingredients by about an inch.  (I use store bought cartons of stock and just refrigerate any portion I don’t use.)

About 30-60 minutes before you want to eat, dice a medium yellow onion and sauté it in butter or vegetable oil until it is nicely browned or even blackened in a few places. 

Dump the onion and butter/oil into the crock pot and stir.  Let the flavors mingle while you make some rice and/or grate some cheddar cheese to sprinkle on top.  These beans are great ladled over rice or a baked potato, but they are fabulous all by themselves in a bowl, with or without a little cheese on top.

This should make about 6 full servings.  If you have leftovers, they make a tasty addition to homemade nachos.

I’m a Feminist and I Cook

kitchen in the midst of cooking, dishes everywhere

I grew up with a grandmother who made turkey and ham at Christmas, a chocolate meringue pie every time she knew my dad was visiting, and who once spent an entire week preparing food for a family reunion.  I grew up watching my mother wrestle apart a whole chicken in the afternoon before dinner and thinking of frozen TV dinners as treats because we only had them when my parents went out and we were with a babysitter.  For a long time I didn’t quite believe that anyone actually ate Kraft macaroni and cheese.  Though I saw the ubiquitous ads, I never once saw it on my plate or in our house, so it remained one of those bizarre things I both knew about and didn’t – until I got to college and found out that other people had different versions of cooking.

I’m not glorifying anything.  My grandmother was an excellent cook and my mom is, too.  Many meals were homemade, though both of them routinely used boxed mixes for cake and brownies.  I’m not trying to talk about purity here.  I’m simply describing what I grew up with as “normal.” 

It was also normal in our family for women to work.  I’m not adding “outside the home,” because for the first 37 years of her life, my grandmother worked on farms.  She was back and forth between the fields and the kitchen and they were long days.  After that, she worked in a Woolworth and I remember many Christmas Eves waiting for her shift to end so we could have dinner and open presents – yes, she cooked the dinner, too.  My mother earned her graduate degree part-time while we were very young and then worked full-time from the time I was 10 years old.  Among their many responsibilities, both women cooked for us.  (It was also normal in my family, at least sometimes, for men to cook.  In the hectic days of high school, my dad was the one to have breakfast ready for all of us each morning before we zoomed out the door in multiple directions.)

I’m contemplating family and cooking after reading Emily Matchar’s fascinating book Homeward Bound: Why Women Are Embracing the New Domesticity.  It’s a bigger book than this one issue, but this is the one sticking with me at the moment.    In the book she describes women who are hands-on about every moment of the food process, from growing and raising it, to canning and slaughtering, to preparing it for the plate.  She highlights people who grind their own flour, make their own baby food, and attempt to become self-sufficient producers of all the food their families eat.  Clearly, that’s one end of a continuum. The other end is the person who buys only prepared and fast food and uses the oven for storage. 

Matchar has written in other places about the new tyranny of cooking imposed by people like Michael Pollan.  She points out that not everyone likes to cook and that now it’s easier than ever to find healthy fast food and prepared food alternatives to the drudgery of cooking.

Anything can become drudgery.  I suppose there may be some folks for whom preparing food would always constitute drudgery.  Certainly, working 12 hours in the field and then coming back to the kitchen to prepare a full meal for the rest of the hungry field crew would wear on you.  I’m sure there were days when my grandmother didn’t feel like making dinner.  I suppose there may even be people who just aren’t that into food and honestly can’t taste the difference between homemade marinara and sauce from a jar.

What’s interesting in Matchar’s book is the prevalence of the phrase “from scratch cooking.”  In fact, she rarely talks about cooking without the word “scratch” in front of it.  Having grown up as I did, this is sort of like saying “cooking cooking.”  It highlights how little many people actually cook and it emphasizes a purity test for what counts as cooking (think, grinding your own flour vs. buying an already roasted chicken and making a few side dishes to go with it).

I’m a fan of utilitarian, go-to meals and I also like exploring new recipes, occasionally even those that should only be tried with a culinary degree.  I know the comfort of ordering take out after a long day, which I invariably think of as “someone else cooking for me.”  I also know the satisfaction of watching the raw ingredients turn into something amazing, just because I followed the steps.  Many, many days, I know the comfort of a good enough meal, pulled together and eaten at home without much fuss or time. 

Bottom line:  It doesn’t all have to be Julia Child and it doesn’t have to take hours to prepare.  You can even use some pre-made ingredients to help yourself out.  It is almost always less expensive and better-tasting when you cook/make it yourself.  There is nothing wrong with a tub of store-bought hummus but why not learn or collect a few easy, inexpensive, healthful, and delicious standbys?

In a week in which we had this throwback to 1950s advertising, it’s important to say it outright:  I’m a feminist and I cook.  One of the themes of Matchar’s book is the way in which the “new domesticity” young women assert that they are “reclaiming” cooking after “feminism told women that cooking was drudgery and shoved them out of the kitchen.”  This is not and never was feminism.  Feminism is about expecting all of the people who want to eat to help cook it.  Feminism is about expecting the world outside of the kitchen to treat men and women equally for the work they do there.

I cook because I need to eat and because it’s a creative and rewarding endeavor.  (I also work because I need to eat.)  And I work because I am called to it.  That’s the best of both worlds and I know it.  To truly love your work and to love the creativity and beauty of feeding and being fed are all blessings.

A few years ago we had a bread-baking retreat at the campus ministry where I work.  We spent the afternoon learning how to bake bread and, while it was rising, reflecting on the prayer we offer during Communion.  Men and women – none of them who’d ever made bread previously – created the loaves we carried into worship that evening.  This wasn’t drudgery or a waste of our time.  And that bread tasted better than our usual loaf.

Working with young folks and having read Matchar’s book, I realize that a lot of people just don’t know where to start.  If you didn’t grow up with pies and homemade macaroni and cheese, it isn’t too late!  To help anyone else out there who may be tired of your own standbys or who may want to learn a few, I’ll be posting 4 or 5 of my simplest and most satisfying recipes over the next few weeks.  So for all of you men and women who may want to include a few more meals at home, here’s the first of my standby recipes.  Bon appétit!

Standby Recipes #1:  Greek Salad

This one is especially refreshing and satisfying in the summer months.  Use any variety of the items below and feel free to change it up to fit your mood.

Put any or all of these ingredients into a large bowl or plate and drizzle with your favorite salad dressing:

  • 3-4 leaves of lettuce, torn by hand into bite sized pieces (red-leaf, green-leaf, romaine, or whatever you like)
  • Handful of canned garbanzo beans (Rinse them first. You’ll have leftovers for another salad later in the week.)
  • Chopped red onion
  •  Sliced or diced cucumbers
  • Diced fresh tomatoes (you can use cherry or grape tomatoes cut in half)
  • 4-6 halved, pitted kalamata olives (you can often find these on an olive or salad bar at the grocery store)
  • Generous sprinkling of Feta cheese, crumbled or diced
  • 2-4 pepperoncini peppers
  • Hardboiled egg, sliced in half or quarters (The only cooking required in this one!)
  • Black pepper, sprinkled on top